The Rolla Holla, Sunday, 9.13.09

The unwritten rules of God’s true church. There are so many and they sure keep things interesting. President Wade taught us that when you are asked to give a talk for 10 minutes, you give one for 8 (something I need to work on, especially in Spanish when I never feel like I say exactly what I want to and so just say A LOT), or that you always offer the presiding authority an opportunity to speak at the end of the meeting, or that a meeting usually has to be pretty short and really good to be better than no meeting at all.
sometimes here in Paraguay they have their OWN set of unwritten rules (mostly because nobody in their right mind would write them). Nestor, a convert of 2 or 3 years in our ward has assumed the post as guardian of the door during the sacrement. It would be an excellent calling for a new convert…except Nestor takes it a little too seriously. Wrestling with door handles against late church-goers until he gets the startled glance and then understanding nod of the Bishop that it is ok to let them pass. Then opening the door just enough for them to get in and closing it right behind them, sometimes knocking up against their heels.
It is also an unwritten rule that you do not drink Terere (cold water poored over the same type of herb used for Mate) in the Sacrament meeting room or in any of your classes and so, consequently, you must miss many parts of important meetings in order to be in the kitchen with your best friends in the ward, participating in one of Paraguay’s favorite pass times.
I guess it is better than outside of the church where there sometimes are no rules whatsoever (written or unwritten). Every night we office Elders come home from fun-filled nights out in our areas and tell the funny stories of things that happen to us. Elder Vail and Elder Vance told us last night of an evangelical lady that they figured knew enough about religion to offer the last prayer on the first visit. Boy did she know. Upon being asked she immediately stood up from her chair, grabbed the two Elders by the head—one in each hand—and proceeded to give them a shouting, chanting, blessing.
Of course, strange prayer experiences aren’t limited to those that aren’t members of our church. My companion and I were lucky enough to be blessed so that we could find ourselves in Heaven one day with Mahatma Gandhi, while praying with one of the less active members we visit. I guess that wouldn’t be so bad…or unlikely.
Well, all is well. I am enjoying life and learning a lot. I love you all!
Elder McCarty